You can't turn back, because this road is all you'll ever have.

It would certainly be cool to be back in NYC right now, before the major heat ploughs through the city and being stuck in traffic is another hell. The City starring Whitney Port just reminds me of that fashonista kind of lifestyle which would be nice but hectic. I see these things on TV and imagine up a time where one day i'll go there and behave like that, have fun like that. But in reality, it's not exactly possible; and an even more long shot when thinking about what's going on with me right now. Traveling to far off destinations where everything is new and exciting is just captivating to the mind, it's something new and different, and feels like a much better place than this country. But every country has their quirks and charm, every country also has their problems and cultural weirdness. However, to me, all of these places are wonderous places where I can breathe. I long for that feeling again.

I only hope Alaska and/or Australia are on the cards this summer.

Which way to go from now? It's a crossroads and I'm unsure how to get through the paths. If I continue going on this road then the future will be messed up because i'll still have the problems, it's just finding a way to speak out and say I'm lost that is the most difficult task. I wish, I always think about how if things had been done differently in the past that I would be better off, and I wouldn't be here; but it's too late to keep thinking about that now since there is nothing I can do about the past.

I want to live life and have fun. I hope it is possible.