If This Is The Life, Why Does It Feel So Good To Die Today?

I miss parts of my old self. Wells, it may be the hormones but I generally feel weird today. With some reluctance, I went to Connex's and thrust into the next step. I'm nowhere near ready but I had no choice. Apparently i'm entitled to £54 or something a week, so yeah. I just feel like being quiet today, having quiet with only incredible music on in the background. I wish I could go out in the middle of the night to a lake and go and wade at the edge. Or even a sea. I just long to be happy and away from here. I seriously don't want to feel miserable or trapped anymore. All I feel I have right at this moment is music. Music is everything to me. I know my boy's just a phone call away, but I'm showing him I'm good on the whole. This is just a temporary tiredness, most likely the hormones. Right?

I hope.